Top 10 Reasons Why Santa Won’t Be Driving a Hummer This Year
#10 – Santa is a jolly old soul who is smart and knows how to do everything right!
This time of year everyone gets so caught up in the holiday rushing about for many reasons.
This recession unfortunately has put many people in difficult positions like keeping their jobs and providing for their families.
So…why not to have some fun… …really, can it hurt? HO HO HO!
#1 – Everyone knows Santa's vehicle (a.k.a: sleigh) has got to be red!
The Hummer's interior only comes in tan leather and the one option is black leather.
I'm not quite sure if Santa is into leather….what do you think?
#2 - Santa needs extreme speed to travel all around the world to deliver toys to the
good boys and girls.
It takes longer for a Hummer to get up to your desired speed because it is such a
beast to get going!
#3 - Santa needs to have great visibility 360 degrees so he doesn't run into any
obstacles or planes in the air.
The Hummer has very poor rear visibility due to the roof pillars, head rests, and
spare tire all of which block the rear window viewing.
#4 - Santa needs easy access into his vehicle as he gets in and out often to go down
those chimneys delivering his gifts.
The Hummer needs to have running boards and handgrips to get in and out of due
due to its height.
#5 – Santa needs to look sleek in his magical sleigh!
The Hummer, also called a modern day behemoth, looks very chunky and squat in its appearance and Santa doesn't need to look more chunky or squatty, he's perfect!
#6 - Santa needs an off road vehicle that can maneuver in any traffic or
The Hummer is not an off road vehicle and it does not negotiate traffic or obstacles
#7 - Santa needs plenty of room to hold all the toys and goodies in his sleigh!
The Hummer has a cramped rear seat that can't even hold 3 adults much less a
huge bag of toys and goodies!
#8 - Santa lands on rooftops with his reindeer pulling his magical sleigh!
The Hummer is a huge vehicle that weighs a ton! He won't be landing on any
rooftops in a Hummer let alone having the reindeer pull it with ease!
#9 - Mrs. Claus is concerned about the recession and seeing as Santa only works
one night a year, how can they afford the cost of a Hummer on his salary?
The average Hummer costs around $50,000 give or take, depending on extras.
Why do you think he uses a beautiful sleigh and eight reindeer to pull it………
It is environmentally friendly! No gasoline needed for the engine to run, No carbon emissions from fossil fuels, The reindeer poop is used for waste recycling and fertilizer, and No need for a spare tire….Santa carries his own!
PEACE ON EARTH…GOODWILL TO ALL MEN!
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38 Responses to “Top 10 Reasons Why Santa Won’t Be Driving a Hummer This Year”
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What great after holiday read. Hummers are great vehicles, but they really are a bit of a hoss. I’d rather see Santa driving a Camaro.January 19th, 2009 at 7:57 pm